Monday, December 22, 2008
The sky is dark, and the stars have blessed me with their presence. The wind blows cold, cutting through me. It chills me deep inside, yet I feel good. I feel stronger as the wind blows around me, as if a gift from the Northern Gods, who may still watch over this descendant of their followers. I close my eyes and feel deeply the icy wind as it stikes me with its cold wings. I feel comfortable, at home some how...not only from living in a colder climate years ago, but as if I did a very long time ago as well. I have the urge to go inside and get my sword, or my axe, and stand there in the cold night wind, gripping the steel as it and I become as cold as the black sky above. I feel myself becoming cold inside, my heart hardening and chilling along with the ground and air. I wonder if this is how my ancestors felt, or maybe I myself , in a life or lives past have felt, becoming one with the elements around them/me. I think that if I stay out here long enough, I will no longer care about anything, except the black sky , the frozen wind, and the still hot blood that pounds through my veins. Part of me thinks this would be a good thing, to be as cold as the breath of Winter itself, harsh and unyielding, to no longer care or let anything bother or worry me, being as sharp and frost-covered as the steel I should be holding in my hand right now. I look up at the sky again, then down, casting my gaze toward the window, where I see my faithful friend, looking at me, and smiling his big dog smile for me. I think of him and all my friends and loved ones. I feel a spark rekindling in my near-frozen heart, and realize that, for now at least, I can't completely give myself to Winter's embrace. I drink one last deep breath of cold Winter air, and with a bit of regret, return to the warm house. The Gods of winter may claim me one day, but not today.